Having just celebrated another birthday, I was tempted to reminisce a bit on the past. But the past is the past, and I try not to look that way too often.
Do I feel old? Sometimes. I know I don't do things like chores as fast as I once did, and maybe that's because I don't have as many deadlines as I once had, and not because I'm slowing down. I do know that the older I get, the more things get crossed off my bucket list, and not necessarily because I have done them. Some things I no longer have the desire to try, like sky diving. How could I have actually wanted to do that? And zip lining is fast going the way of sky diving. Has my sense of adventure disappeared or has common sense taken over?
Then there are the new things that have appeared in my life, like Finnish language lessons. I know I will never learn enough to really carry on a conversation in that language with a native speaker, but I love the sound of the words; and maybe, just maybe, I can pick up a few words here and there. Music has always been one of the staples in my life, and that is not changing. I now have a new kantele (thanks, Larry), and am contemplating getting Mom's banjo out of the attic and possibly taking lessons. Reading is one of my passions; now I have time to read a greater variety of books than I ever did before, although I know I will never get everything read that I would like to. I have also learned a few new skills - a bit of drawing, knitting, crocheting, quilting (that is a very questionable skill), and both ballroom and swing dancing.
I believe the real secret to not feeling old, or being old, or feeling sorry for yourself, is to never look back. You cannot change the past. I learned a long time ago that you make the best choice you can at the time, then move on. You can only change the future, and what you choose to do with your future is up to you.
