Den went to Home Depot and here I sit, listening to a Peter, Paul and Mary tribute on college radio and feeling sorry for myself. This time of year is always hard for me, but this year seems worse than usual, and that aggravates me no end. There are so many things that need doing, and I have no energy or desire to "do." Then the guilt sets in.
How many things could I have gotten done today if I had really tried? Plants need repotting, kitchen cupboards need cleaning, windows need to be washed. I could have written, either finished a story that's almost done, or worked on my book. My grandmother's quilt needs to be finished, there's the sweater waiting for me to finish knitting, and the baby bag to finish crocheting. So what did I do all day? Slept, walked the dog, dusted the pool room and watered the plants. Did I mention that I took a nap or two? I never take naps!
So what is wrong with me? Why do I feel so depressed and discontented? Can't be the weather -- it was 75 degrees outside today, with only a bit of rain this morning. It's so bad that, when I was looking through the Eddie Bauer catalog, I was wishing that I had the life the model was portraying. That's pretty sad. All I can say is, I hope this feeling goes away soon. I know I won't feel so bad when it gets colder outside, even though the days will be shorter -- go figure. But until then, I think I will go sit in the living room, listen to the blues on the radio and feel sorry for myself. I might even have a good cry.
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ReplyDeleteYou have given me the chance to throw my 2 cents on the table...watch out:))
I have found, that during depressing or stressful times a good movie is a great opportunity to escape from yourself...yup yourself. So many times we don't always know "WHY?" But if we can escape into another time and place, or someone elses time and place we can recharge.
There are all kinds of names and thoughts for this feeling...so what. Try it...it might work.
The best,
Tom
Thanks for the suggestion, Tom; you weren't the only one who suggested a good movie. Just might have to try it. Trouble is, I'm not good at movies; can't seem to sit through one, although that has been less of a problem of late.
ReplyDeleteJust spent the afternoon with my sister and some friends, so that has helped my mood. Maybe even dancing tonight!